Hoooah

Ohmigosh... I'm so excited. So much is happening that is good. I'm going to be in a much better place in my life in a few months. I know that this is a great move. I have the support of everyone that matters and those that think I'm wrong or 'abandoning my kids' don't know anything about me, clearly...

I spoke to the father of my children and he is willing to sign whatever paperwork he needs to, in order to provide them such such a good chance at the future. I am glad he's maturing and since the guy he hates is out of the picture, he has very little resentment towards me. Isn't it funny how by one single act can change the dynamic of everything. Anyways, he's trying to be a support and promised to visit the kids as often as possible.

I also spoke to my Sister who is willing to take them for the duration with promises that she will set up video-calls between me and my kids, as well as send me progress reports and letters and pictures and videos, as well as any carepackage I may want. I'm so glad. She's the best. I will be paying her a small fortune to take care of my babies and I know she will do it for me, not out of a simple family obligation but also out of complete love for her sister, the love we share, our bond. <3

My mom has agreed to pay for the vet-bills for Michias so he will be able to enter the states and spend the most time with me before I enlist and go to basic. I am so glad because he's my boy and I'm going to miss him sooo much. She's also going to meet me where I'm flying to at the end of August, along with my Aunt. To top that, she's already making sure the family that isn't supportive knows my reasons for all of this.

Not to mention how much love and support I have recieved from all my future Brothers-in-Arms, not that they find it all that surprising. I talked to an old friend last night, who when I told him responded, "sort of figured." He serves in the Army too and we went to the same Military high school in Germany. I suppose, considering the numbers of how many have signed up since then, it really isn't. I've been avoiding this step for so long and now I can feel myself finding peace in this.

I'm not afraid of basic, I'm not afraid of AIT, I'm not even afraid of going to war. I'm not afraid of being shot at or having to save lives (which will be my training) or dying. It's kind of creepy, but my mother planned my funeral. If I die in combat, I will be buried at Arlington with a full Military funeral. I seriously hope I can get married before that happens.

There's this guy that I really like, that for the past couple months I've been talking to. He did something for me that can never fully be repaid as well as how calming he is to me. I can be afraid of something and he says the right words, if I don't know how to do something, he either tells me how or finds out himself. It's amazing to know that such a man exists, and for him to want to see me before he gets shipped out in August makes me really glad. A little over a month and we'll see each other and we'll get to know where we stand. I am very excited about July too.

Then the father of my kids is flying out here for the last two weeks in August to help me get things settled out here and spend some time with the kids. I'll finish the rest of the paperwork here and we'll sign it in front of a notary to get it legally binding. :) no lawyers needed anymore.

The only thing that really sucks is that i have to give up my smaller rodents. They won't be able to come with me and I'll have to say goodbye to them. I sincerely hope all goes smoothly because I've been on my knees more lately, prayin to the Man upstairs. God help me through this. I know you are watching over me now, please grant me the strength and courage and fortitude I need more than anything else.

<3